Must it be?

I am exhausted. Not because it was a particularly gruelling day at work or anything like that... I received an email from The Ex, and with all that is involved in responding to it and working through everything that accompanies that including tears and all it has left me spent.

I was in a relationship with a wonderful man. Things took a wrong turn somewhere and we broke up earlier this year. What kills me is that as wrong as what he did was I still love him dearly... hence the tears. I realize that letting it go is what I must do. It is not what I want to do but I am resigned to the fact that this is what he wants and therefore it must be. I have never experienced anything on this scale when it comes to having my heart completely broken. He was everywhere in me and having to realize that there is soon a time approaching when I will not be in touch with him, not get to hold his hand, hot get to do any of the myriad things we did together... well it almost seems like more than I can bare.

In brighter and less emotional news I am one step closer to getting the job I have been hankering for for some time now. I started with the company that made me an offer a few weeks ago but this one is like the mother ship calling me home. I want this job bad and I will know by the end of the week if I have it or not. Wish me luck.

I also wanted to post a little something here about an experience I had recently at Whole Foods in Manhattan. Having registered my complaint through the proper channels with no response I am finding the need to get a little more public with what happened to me.

After having grabbed just a few thing for dinner the other night I approached a cashier and as I got closer to her I heard her say, as she leaned over to the cashier next to her, "Why does that faggot keep staring at me?" Can you believe it? Of course I immediately spoke with a manager and also emailed the CEO (who has a blog - but it is moderated to filter out any unsavory comments of course) and nothing.... no response whatsoever. So, Whole Foods you can just Fuck Off! and if any of you who read this feel the need to voice your displeasure with Whole Foods please do so.
Thanks.

The pic is very much my state of mind as I try to get to sleep tonight.